Manchurian Huma?

Today I was going to write a brief history of Huma Abedin problem is I became bored and I also couldn't fail to notice almost everyone has already written about her. Check her DOB and you will see on the very first page a long list of articles questioning her history and suitability to be Hillary Clinton main assistant. I can only read the same thing so many times before it occurs to me that A) most writers are better than me and B) I don't want to copy or search. I've grown into the habit of writing what I think straight off the top of my head. Its opinion I don't care if anyone reads it still less do I care if anyone agrees with it.

And, what did I want to say about Huma Abedin anyway? That she might be some sort of mole for half a dozen major Middle Eastern donors to Hillary Clinton campaign and to the Clinton Foundation? Everyone knows that so why bother.

What about she was a working mum who worked away from home a great deal and does that give Anthony Weiner an excuse for being such a stupid, arrogant and failed pervert? I don't think so.

What about for someone who was raised in a strict Muslim household with both parents convinced Islam empowers women, they must be certifiable, Huma Abedin has done an admirable job of throwing off the shackles of subservience and making a successful career. She has also thrown off the burka and all head coverings associated with Islam, none of which are required by Islam but all of which seem to be required by many Muslim men.

In many ways Huma Abedin is a remarkable and admirable example of independent woman throwing off the shackles of the dominant male without apparently wounding the dominant males feelings too much, although there is still the problem of Anthony and his little idiosyncrasies.

I honestly don't know about Huma Abedin but if she did or does have a file called 'Life Insurance' knowing the Clintons I think that is another example of forethought and wisdom.

Failing any incriminating evidence as yet undiscovered I admire her achievement and wish her well, and a speedy divorce Anthony Weiner was not a good choice... 

Hillary Clinton V Donald Trump

I'm not a natural Donald Trump supporter I would have preferred to support Bernie Sanders but I was sure right from the beginning that Hillary Clinton had the Democratic nomination stitched up and whatever Sanders did he would not win the nomination and guess what, its now proven Clinton and her DNC cohorts fiddled the Democrat nomination and she 'won'. Nice and possibly criminal fraud but with so many crimes to choose from where she is concerned who cares about rigging the Democrat nomination, right?

I do actually so from the start I watched Donald Trump. He's not a politician but he has always been interested in politics and for many years he has donated to both Democrat and Republican candidates and causes. In some instances it was probably because it made good business sense to be on the right side at the right time, but that doesn't negate his interest it heightens it. As far as I know his business interests have always been legal and his behaviour if sometimes reprehensible has always been within the law.

I like that Donald Trump speaks the language of the voter not the politician. I like that so far as I can see he has, in spite of two divorces maintained a strong, affectionate relationship with his children and I like that even though they were probably carefully selected the members of his business who have spoken for him appear to have done so easily and without sounding rehearsed.

So, I like much of what I've seen and learned about Donald Trump and as importantly I strongly dislike almost everything I've seen and learned about Hillary Clinton. I must admit I've been anti Clinton since good ole boy Bill did his best to disgrace the Oval office. I don't care how many blow jobs he gets but I do care when he thinks its fine to have one in the Oval office as long as no one finds out. He should have more respect for the office of the President of the United States but he didn't then and I doubt he's changed much.

I believe both Bill and Hillary Clinton adore their daughter Chelsea from some things I've read Hillary may not have had a maternal instinct until she gave birth to Chelsea but I don't believe there's a shred of doubt that she loved her from that moment. The open displays of affection are the most normal, endearing things about Bill and Hillary Clinton, but its not enough to camouflage their indifference to all the women Bill Clinton has abused or to the twelve year old victim of a rapist that in a truly appalling display of cruelty and ignorance to his victim Hillary Clinton got off with time served. Nothing can camouflage the fact the rapists victim was twelve year old child injured so badly she was in a coma for five days and could never have children and that Hillary Clinton knew he was guilty.

If I were able to vote in the election tomorrow I would vote for Donald Trump and give him the chance to clean out the cesspit that Washington has become. I hope he wins because if he is true to his word he will be very good for America

It occurs to me that this looks as though I've given no thought to the different careers and policies of Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump and that's misleading and wrong. I've looked long and hard at both but frankly I think concentrating on careers and policies gives Donald Trump an easy victory.

I don't believe Donald Trump is the wonderful human being being presented to us as. I believe much of his generosity is for PR purposes and his main attitude is My way or No way.

Hillary is an open and fascinating book. She is a career politician, utterly indifferent to everything except the very few people she cares about and corrupt beyond the entire western experience of corrupt politicians.

I therefore believe comparing the two careers and policies achieves little and would be too one sided in terms of practical achievement, better for me to concentrate on what we know of both families. Donald Trump appears close and loyal to his family and seems to be held in deep affection and respect he has other achievements but why go there they are very well known.

Hillary Clinton appears devoted to Bill and daughter Chelsea and as odd as it seems I don't doubt Bill Clinton is just as devoted to Hillary and Chelsea. Chelsea in spite of their reputations seems to regard both parents with an affection and respect that equals the Trump family.

I Just Happened

To be thinking of this blog and how unscrupulous, smug & abhorrent some creatures of the night are so obviously I came here to vent.

This is me and mine alone. I don't mind who reads it as long as the stats reflect their visits and since this blog is not publicized there should not in any event be many visitors, and yes, I do know there are ways I could check for myself but I don't write this blog to create work or problems for myself I write it to please myself, those who get paid for their less than interesting efforts should think on that.

I won't be stopping and thanks to their never ending interest I may well increase my output and what could be better and more satisfying than that?  Indeed if they don't stop interfering with the stats and trying to intimidate me I may well extend my attention to other admittedly boring but on the other hand even more suspicious sites.

I'm not one who would throw good money after bad to do my house up or get my teeth fixed, nor am I one who would get a divorce because I make a good living pretending I can write and so can safely dump the rapidly aging other half.

Mistakes were made but mine were in innocence and I'm the only one who can say that.

There is a debt and it WILL BE PAID

CSA Inquiry

Appears to have been almost entirely emasculated and in the throws of deteriorating into a massive and very expensive talking shop. All very luvvie no doubt and as a consequence almost entirely useless.

Many, perhaps most victims of CSA & CPA (child sexual abuse and child physical abuse) in government, religious and privately owned institutions want some form of financial compensation, partly because it may help to finance their recovery from all the lost years of and after their stolen childhood and partly because it is physical proof of belief and regret, but I believe what the vast majority really want is for their abusers to be thrown in prison for a very long time.

Recently a senior police officer was sentenced to twelve years in prison for sexually and physically abusing boys in their early teens in his care. Gordon Anglesea is a sadistic paedophile/pederast who gives the lie to every academic argument and there have been many in favour of paedophilia and pederasty. At Gordon Anglesea age twelve years is not so bad. He will be in a nice, safe open prison all bills paid and protected from every wind that blows, whatever compensation his victims are entitled to and its a lot will never be enough to compensate for the abuse they endured and it most certainly will not bring back the young man who committed suicide after the evil monster won a libel case against the magazine that publicly called him a paedophile.

Some people are fragile and they not Gordon Anglesea, are the ones I want to concentrate on here. The CSA Inquiry appears to be suffering more from an overwhelming presence of victims of abuse than from an absence of care and attention.

In spite of all the protestations most victims of CSA are not experts on paedophilia or CSA in general, at best the only thing they are expert of is their own suffering, they can't and shouldn't claim to know more than their own experience. Counselling for victims of CSA is a relatively new branch of counseling services. I think the truth if its ever told,, is that most professional counselors didn't give it a thought until about six years ago. Rape counseling is much older but the two share nothing more than a very tenuous link and to compensate for the lack of real expertise some victims of CSA have set themselves up as both counselors and advocates.

Really its very laudable and understandable but it may not be at all healthy. Some may have no more than their own experience to refer to and rely upon and some unscrupulous people may try to take advantage of wounded victims, some counselors appear to have links to lawyers who concentrate on the potentially lucrative compensation market and some may go so far as to try to insert their own experiences of child abuse onto the already wounded minds and emotions of other victims of abuse.

Its a messy, dangerous area and apparently either totally unpoliced or insufficiently policed, this is because its recognition is so recent rules and regulations are lagging behind, but rules and regulations are needed in this almost more than in any other area of sexual abuse and domestic violence abuse.

And its this area I believe is in danger of destroying the investigation into child sexual abuse. Its no good well meaning people giving time and authority to victims of abuse who basically are no more than experts of and witnesses to their own abuse. No two people are the same and no two people have the same indepth reaction to years of abuse, there are similarities but they are superficial only expert attention should be given to victims because every other has the potential to do more harm than good to people in crisis and also completely overlooks the, however unpleasant, fact that some victims of abuse do go on to become abusers and that is a very specialist area indeed.

Because of their abuse and very often because their claims of abuse have been ignored for years some victims become aggressive in their championing of what they believe victims need, these are possibly the most dangerous people hovering over the CSA Inquiry. The emotional and physical pain they endured can cloud the judgement of well meaning people to such an extent they subjugate their own experience and indeed common sense in attempting to be supportive and empathic toward noisy, aggressive victims.

The CSA Inquiry has lost its main lawyers. I was no supporter of Ben Emmerson and I still think he was a bit more of a bull in a china shop than was needed. Lowell Goddard was not a choice I agreed with either and now both have gone but the reasons they have gone appear to be at best murky and possibly for very good reason. Emmerson made it clear from the start he would not tolerate interference from so called victims panels and Lowell Goddard appears to have gone for when you read between the lines much the same reason.

The problem is the law doesn't and can't take sides no lawyer will take orders from a victim when the subject is the law and if any victim of abuse wants justice they have got to use the law to get it nothing else will work. For the CSA Inquiry to succeed victims of abuse must allow the lawyers to do their job, and this hasn't happened in the CSA Inquiry to the extent senior lawyers have packed their briefcases and gone, there might be a fleeting moment of victory for some very vocal victims and their supporters but the reality is its a major loss to the CSA Inquiry and will be felt most and hurt the victims of CSA more than any other if they see their allegations reduced to touchy feely ineffective comments in a very expensive talking shop

I think the CSA Inquiry as it is now formed will be ineffective and maybe counter productive. It should be abandoned and a new Inquiry formed that will keep victims at arms length so that real investigation can take place into the many institutions and VIP paedophiles who at the moment seem to be about to get off - again.

Its a Knack...

I didn't want to. Its not like I planned it. On the contrary I did in fact do my best to avoid the necessity. I placed the order and whilst doing so I couldn't fail to notice there was no Cats Club. None. To say I was peed off about that is to put it very mildly. Well! I could hardly watch them starve could I? I gave in. I girded my loins, took a big bag and went to town.

I was not, as they used to say, a happy bunny and the disenchantment grew...I could tell something was wrong as I strolled up the road, and yes it is up there is a definite incline not enough to call a hill but its there nevertheless, it never rains but it fucking hisses down.

It was a bank holiday, almost every shop, not that I like any of them, was shit shut. I snarled a bit but I knew Tesco would be open and that after all was where I was headed. I don't know how I manage to do it but I'm pretty sure I have an unbroken record for going into town to get shopping on the one day the shops are shut...

Shopping online is a real boon if not for it I would be a corpse by now but I do still get irritated. I mean I can't use 4 pints of milk, I'm not unwilling indeed I've tried but it just can't be done, the milk goes all peculiar before I get halfway down the massive bottle, so of course I always order 2 pint bottles. Not this time. Milk is milk I refuse to pay almost E50 cents more for a posh bottle when Tesco own brand is only E79 cents! So that was added to the list.

Not light weight do you see? I was only going to get six tins of Cat Club but I couldn't resist it I had to get 12 tins, and naturally I had to get some eclairs for the addict. Not by any means a lot of shopping but definitely heavy...I didn't consider a taxi A) I don't like three of the taxi drivers I know and B) I forgot to get cash back at the checkout. I told myself not to worry I could walk to the bank and get some cash there. I lied. I turned at the nearest shortcut and staggered onward.

You have no idea how heavy shopping can get in no more than a minute or two. I mean bearing in mind the wretched bag was heavy before I left the shop.

I struggled on and made it to the bench on what passes for a main road in Mayo and sat down to get my breath back and unstick my aching fingers from the handles of the bag.  And, that's when I got lucky! One of my nice neighbours, yes I do have some and I'm very grateful to them, stopped and gave me a lift home!

Right to my door! Once inside the world returned to its usual not quite alive but not yet dead condition, the addict had her fix, my legs stopped trembling, the almost life gradually flowed down to my finger tips and once in doors I made a cup of tea and spent a happy hour checking the houses for sale in Clacton and day dreaming which is I am here to tell you a hell of a lot better than real life in Mayo.

Did I mention Trixie has taken to using my laptop as a stepping stone to anywhere else? I don't blame her its not as though I like this one anymore. As soon as I get to Clacton its gone, gone into the bin if I have anything to do with it...

How Come

We never notice our poxy shoes have sprung a leak the size of piggin Watergate until we're too far from home to walk back and so end up squelching through puddles and watching bubbles burst from the side of what was once the sole of our shoe. And before some twat asks why waste time looking at your feet in such situations, its important to watch! bad enough if the waters slithering in through the sole how much worse if it also pours in over the top of the shoe?

I have shoes, in fact for someone who doesn't really like shoes at all and spends most of the year in flip flops I have lots of shoes. Its too bad I only ever take one pair outside...I've had it with shoes.

Well of course it unsettled me squelching into town wasn't exactly what I had in mind when I decided the miserable dump wasn't worth getting dressed up for,, and that's not fair many of the people I see in town are really lovely, kind salt of the earth people, its a pity the rest of them are the spawn of Satan. Anyway I think someone spotted my Gucci watch and now thinks I robbed a jewelers. Up her leg. I bought it from a stall in Norwich about ten years ago its about as Gucci as I am but I will say this it cost less than a tenner, keeps excellent time, and you can only tell its not Gucci if you look closely enough to see most of the 'gold' has faded away.

I did what little shopping I had to do, I was going to order online but I think I do that too often, spend more money on rubbish when I do, and don't get any exercise. How was I to know it was going to bucket down as soon as I reached the main road...

This Site Can't be Reached!

The trouble with some, ahem, cough, snarl, 'communities' is in spite of all the evidence against them and of which they are fully aware, they manage to talk themselves into believing they are victims. This happens because unsurprisingly their guilt is the one subject they can't share with anyone outside the 'community'. So what you get is the same discredited, dishonest and fictitious nonsense regurgitated until the 'community' believes its own lies.

Not good enough, not acceptable and not an encouraging sign of future anonymity is it?

I suggest the teensy little problem be fixed before I get impatient. I want my freedom and my anonymity returned I take very little interest in what the 'community' want and I will not be held by any agreement I wasn't fully informed of and didn't in anyway agree to be part of, its a little thing called equality.

You see you really can't decide you have reached an agreement with someone when you can't even admit your own name to them. 

Been There, Done That. Worried!

It worries me, I can't help it, it worries me. Do I believe someone would steal my dogs? Ordinarily no although I know there is a trade in England I've never worried about it here, until now.

Neither dog is what you might call prepossessing both being cross breeds and neither having any obvious talent, except possibly the unenviable ability to be torn apart by other dogs in a matter of seconds.

I should have ordered stuff and got it delivered but I had a letter to post and I didn't intend to buy much until I noticed Tesco have reintroduced Cats Club and my cats and dogs love Cats Club. What can I tell you to misquote psycho Hillary Clinton who misquoted Julius Ceasar: I saw, I bought, I suffered.

It had to be done I tell ye! I couldn't be sure the branch that does the deliveries would stock them and I couldn't bear the thought of not getting the girls something they like so much. I regret it. It always takes me hours to get over the walk into and the walk back from town and what's worse this time I forgot my walking stick: left it in the bank! Which I didn't even need to enter except I was in town and I thought might as well kill two birds with one stone and both feet.

I didn't like the careful inquiry about names it unsettled me and I  know I will worry incessantly. I wish I hadn't gone, but then again I'm glad I bought Cats Club the girls loved it for dinner all four of them, yes the dogs had to have some too and I daresay I'm worrying for nothing...

Updated 19/10/2016

Great News! The Bank of Ireland had my walking stick and gave it to me immediately, I was so pleased and grateful. Actually its not my walking stick, well it is but it was my uncles walking stick first. I like it better than any other because its long almost a mini staff or, as some might be well advised to look upon it, a very long baseball bat...

Enough! Its back in my hot little paws now and I need it. It helps me when I get puffed and/or when my hips/knees/joints hurt.

What Difference?

No difference is the answer my attitude is the longer I stay away the more the usual suspects relax. I don't exactly care about that because in a way all it means is the shock when it comes and it will will be so much greater as a result of their over confidence and premature relaxation.

That's it, nothing has changed and unless a deal is agreed nothing will change until I change it...

Teddy Bear

Today Trish and Tony had to say goodbye to their handsome Teddy and I thought I would say a few words about this loving, loyal boy who had such a bad start to life he never entirely recovered.

Some years ago neighbours of Trish and Tony began complaining about a dog barking in a near by back garden, of course they couldn't ignore it they went to see what was wrong.

Teddy had been left in the back garden of the house when his owners moved out, just abandoned to a small square basically no more than a yard, no one to care for him, talk to him and take him for walks. It seems one or other of the previous owners would return from time to time and throw some food over the fence. Obviously Trish and Tony wouldn't tolerate that, they got Teddy out of the garden and took him home and that's when Teddy met Leo the only dog he ever cared about, they became best friends as Teddy settled into his new life of long walks, the best food and people who loved him.

It can't have been easy, there was a dispute with the previous owner who had to be threatened with legal action before he gave Trish and Tony legal ownership, and then training courses were arranged for Teddy I'm not sure but I think he failed all of them. He simply could not overcome his past enough to be relaxed around any other dog than his Leo. It made no difference to Trish and Tony they took him for walks late at night, early morning and in less populated areas. Teddy was a very lucky, happy boy

I met Teddy soon after he was rescued, this big handsome boy came to my house and put Ollie right in his place which for safety sake was locked in my bedroom whenever Trish, Tony, Teddy and Leo came to visit.

My poor Ollie was so upset! He absolutely adored Leo and Leo this big handsome Sandringham Labrador was so kind and tolerant to Ollie my little American Cocker Spaniel he got the impression he could do what he liked. It took Teddy to make it known in no uncertain terms that he most definitely could not!

Leo has gone so this year has my wonderful Ollie and now today Teddy has gone to join them I have no doubt at all Ollie will have his nose put severely out of joint and will have to find a good hiding place.

This is Teddy Bears story as I remember it. I hope Trish and Tony don't object and if I've made mistakes tell me.

RIP handsome Teddy Bear Trish and Tony made sure you had the life you deserve

Hillary Clinton V Donald Trump

This is Donald Trump talking about women when he thinks he's having a private conversation with fellow men

This is Hillary Clinton describing her defence of the person who raped a twelve year old girl so badly she was left in a coma for five days and could never have children. Hillary is laughing. Well, I'm sure there's nothing funnier than saying a twelve year old girl is interested in older men and fantasizes about being raped by men in their forties who by the way just happen to be neighbours.

Yeah.

I don't like Donald Trumps comments I think they're typical boorish male but I don't think they're criminal or particularly offensive. It wasn't about me. It wasn't a serious threat to women.

I absolutely loath Hillary Clintons comments about the rape of a twelve year old there is no excuse she went way beyond mere defence and in going that extra light year she compounded the serious, life altering injuries a child had to endure and then live with, there is no comparison between what Hillary Clinton did and what Donald Trump said none whatsoever

This is Donald Trump being as polite at its humanly possible to be about Bill Clinton a serial abuser of women and Hillary Clinton his wife of decades and his main protector from the accusations of his victims.

There is no comparison and for the record I think both Hillary and Bill Clinton should be in prison not trying to return to the Oval Office Bill Clinton disgraced.

Blogger Me...

We are NOT all professional bloggers I never had the least ambition to be professional and just in case anyone thinks there must have been an ulterior motive I didn't think like that out of some touchy feely please like me modesty. I thought being an amateur would or should remove me from whatever the competition was if that is there was competition. You see I didn't know and I really didn't care. I didn't want to know about numbers and popularity I thought it was wonderful if I got one visitor! Now I don't trust any, sad that.

Not all bloggers want to be professional, not all bloggers want to be part of a team when in some cases they are unlikely even to know such teams/gangs/groups/communities (Huh!) exist before they start blogging. 

I like blogging even though I know the one who illegally filmed me and then shared the film among his community; is also a blogger and I know the reason he felt empowered to do that is possibly because his online 'community' gave him the excuse he needed and faith in his own invincibility.

All very well to think that's harsh but think of the alternative some middle aged pervert trying to film someone he thought of as a young girl even though most of the blurb in this and every other blog I write says the writer is older. So is he a perv a drunk or thick or what? 

Changing the subject slightly but they are loosely connected:

I don't often lose my temper some people think that's funny I think it would be funny if I allowed every little hindrance or irritation to anger me and most of the time there are more subtle ways to make a point.

We are who we are and it would be a boring world if we were all the same, besides the particular cretin who thinks calm is funny is in so much shite I'm certain he will have plenty of opportunities to show us all how he throws his dolly out of the pram.

Today, however, I lost my temper. If I'd had a blunt instrument I would have putt it to excellent use. I'm not going into huge detail I'm saving that for the inevitable excuses from the culprit.  

Generous?

The question mark is because almost everyone I know would almost certainly say I have been very generous, that’s not a boast its a simple statement of fact nor is it something I regret. Except I do sometimes wonder if my generosity was for the person I gave to or perhaps more honestly really, deep down for me?

Is giving money a sign of generosity or is it the easiest thing to do if you have enough to give without leaving yourself short? Because real generosity is when you risk leaving yourself without something you need and I’m not sure I’ve ever done that.

Was being generous to others a way of indulging myself? I do wonder now if that was one reason for my generosity. As I grow older I realise I also kept a very detailed record of all those I was generous toward, and I don’t mean that in a physical or personal way about anyone I remember all of them! And I must admit I’m a bit ashamed of that.

So not very generous after all and maybe not very considerate either I gave because it was easy and very selfish. It served two purposes one it pushed the problem away and  two it enabled me to feel good about myself. The older I get the more I realise I wasn’t generous at all

Generosity was standing outside in an old dressing gown, not caring about cold, rain  or passers by, to rescue a tiny kitten for nothing. I don’t know if it was wise it maybe why I’ve got some sort of bug, but I’d do it again right now and as I grow older I realise doing something that takes more than money is real generosity of spirit and thought.

 =

Always I come back as to an old and valued friend sometime soon I will stop somethings and start others afresh but always I will hold this my oldest and friendliest blog in deep affection.

Moon

I saw the moon last night
So full it blossomed almost red

Once I'd have been there with it
Joyous in the light cast shadows

No more I watched from the window
As she sailed behind and beyond

The trees of long reaching arms
The boughs of many burdens

Joy moved
A bitter harvest

Blogs and Bloggers

There are blogs about how to blog, blogs about the best subject to blog, blogs about law, blogs about child abuse, blogs about domestic violence, blogs about animals, gardening, fashion, paganism, polytheism, witchcraft, trains, buses, aeroplanes and so on...There are blogs about blogs, blogs about how to get more visitors and there are blogs that like to consider themselves magazines or better yet newspapers.

There are journalists who are bloggers and whilst they do usually have a blog they boast about they often also have blogs they would rather not be publicly associated with and there are bloggers who tell as many people as possible especially if the occasion demands it the police, that they are journalists.

Many bloggers are or were teachers. I always say the only reason an English teacher, for eg, is teaching is they can't actually write, and this is a subject I'm going to explore fully with examples in a blog coming to your doubtless eager eyes and gnashing teeth soon. I don't pay much attention to my own grammar and punctuation bloggers put me off and then I got stubborn...But! I do pay attention to some others depend upon it it will be educational

I'm not against blogging I like my blogs and I like to read the blogs others write, but I have discovered through painful experience that there's an underbelly to blogging, several times bloggers have gone too far been caught and managed to look as though theirs is an isolated case, but if you look you find its not an isolated case at all it is in fact the modus operandi and main reason for the existence of many blogs, which in case you hadn't realised it is to become famous celebrities by exposing the outrageous behaviour of others as much as possible. Imagine it all the lonely self deceiving bloggers loose in the ether all of them thinking they know everything and, this is the important bit, they are above the law.

It may not seem so but I think blogs can be very dangerous things they seem to give some bloggers a sense of power, a feeling of invincibility as if they don't live in this world they frolic in an other worldly bubble happily trapped and usually only threatened when one or other of those isolated cases get caught, and that too is a subject I intend to explore fully in the not too distant future, and again there will be several examples.

It seems to me blogging is an illusion to which some particularly vulnerable people with perhaps not many friends in the real world cling. It saves them from reality and I don't know if that's a good or bad thing. I do know if I had been such a person with no experience and much younger I might have fallen into it, perhaps even with family, friends and sixty years experience I might have succumbed, if that is some bloggers hadn't shown the blogging underbelly they never talk, let alone write about in all its vicious, parasitical and hypocritical glory.

I've had enough of all of them and from now on they can all expect me to be on their backs. Here and quite soon on a new web site and from a new laptop. Truth is truth even for bloggers

Don't Like Don't Trust

That would be me some people don’t like or trust me. Aint life a bitch and then as they say you meet one and that ‘one’ would be me.

I don’t blame them for their attitude if they knew or fully understood what I think of them they’d never step outside their front door again. So its a two way street with heavy traffic and no acknowledged right of way. I could care less.

My offer wasn’t made to help them it was entirely selfish because what I should do is report their activities as high up the ladder as its possible to go but so far I haven’t, not for them or any individual among them although I doubt the hive does individual thought. What it does is talk among themselves rarely telling the truth within the hive and never even mentioning the hive or its activities to outsiders except maybe to hint at great friends and lie.

No, I do nothing for them its all, and I admit its very selfish, about me. I want my self respect and my privacy back, and as far as I’m concerned going to court doesn’t help that, eventually it would obviously but eventually can take a very long time and involve a great deal of mind crushing, excruciating embarrassment. If I have to I will take that route but only a fool would think I’d want to go anywhere near it, certainly no one who knows me would think it for a second.

My offer would avoid all attention and embarrassment. It would also take care of the nasty and ever present possibility of criminality being repeated. No one who has donated once wants to explain anything and that is protection I need.

Do I care if I’m trusted or liked by people I can’t bring myself to be civil to? No, not a bit. However much they dislike and distrust me they can quadruple it and still be nowhere near what I think of them.

The Life that I have by Leo Marks

The life that I have

Is all that I have

And the life that I have

Is yours.

The love that I have

Of the life that I have

Is yours and yours and yours.

A sleep I shall have

A rest I shall have

Yet death will be but a pause.

For the peace of my years

In the long green grass

Will be yours and yours and yours.

Its some time since I put a chocolate box poem on here but I was reminded of this one just a short while ago and of course I still love it for who could not?

However, its not really a chocolate box poem Its rather more often and just as famously known as The Code Poem for the French Resistance.

Here is a paragraph from Wikipedia:

In the war, famous poems were used to encrypt messages. This was, however, found to be insecure because enemy cryptanalysts were able to locate the original from published sources. Marks countered this by using his own written creations. The Life That I Have was an original poem composed on Christmas Eve 1943 and was originally written by Marks in memory of his girlfriend Ruth, who had just died in a plane crash in Canada.^[1] On 24 March 1944, the poem was issued by Marks to Violette Szabo, a French agent ofSpecial Operations Executive who was eventually captured, tortured and killed by the Nazis.
It was made famous by its inclusion in the 1958 movie about Szabo, Carve Her Name with Pride, where the poem was said to be the creation of Violette's husband Etienne. (Marks allowed it to be used under the condition that its author not be identified.)

And a link to the page:  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Life_That_I_Have

Ghost in the Works

I’se got blisters. I’se got blisters on me blisters and I’ve got the right ump and before anyone sneers they’re not on ‘eels or toes. Nah, that would be too easy these blisters are on the souls of me feet.

The cause of the blisters is a walk to town wearing the wrong shoes, those would be the shoes currently awaiting a short trip to the bin which will happen when the rubbish bag is full & me blisters have gorn.

In the meantime and to while away an hour or less I want to write about ghosts in the works.

I’ve been re reading books by Terry Pratchett and you have no idea how much it has irritated me.

I happen to know because I have read all the Disk World books that Terry Pratchett did not always obey the rules of grammar and punctuation, he had the courage to do his own thing So funnily enough did George Bernard Shaw who never allowed an apostrophe to cross the threshold of his literary efforts. He said the poor apostrophe was ‘uncouth bacilli’ and who am I to even check the meaning of ‘bacilli’ although I have got uncouth down to a fine art.

The thing is unlike the great writers ghostwriters never forget grammar and punctuation indeed most of them would probably be unemployed if not for rigid education insistence that English be written in a manner that keeps them employed.

I’ve no idea if Terry Pratchett had ever heard of Pippakin I really doubt it and  I do like to think he hadn’t.

I don’t think there is any doubt that Terry Pratchett had ghost writer/s and whoever they were maybe male but they write female and I really don’t like that, they as ghost writers should be able to keep their narration completely asexual and in my opinion they failed. I don’t like what they did to Terry Pratchett Disk World series some might say its better than nothing I disagree, they should have followed Terry Pratchett instinct not their own, and I don’t like that they may have taken the opportunity to put the boot into someone they dislike, they are become a ghost in the works…

Maybe Not

Sometimes it seems to me we live our lives in a world of Maybe not adrift from reality but reaching, hoping for Maybe to be suddenly, wonderfully definite. You see Maybe has potential not necessarily for the best or even for the good but there’s a definite possibility in every Maybe.

Thinking back to those long gone days in school when Maybe was quite narrow, we’d pass this, win that, be accepted for something or other, or Maybe we’d all go to the show and meet the Beatles and in my case anyway John Lennon would be immediately smitten! Oh, Maybe!

Leaving school is when Maybe grew up. Maybe another job would pay better or if it didn’t Maybe it had better prospects or was closer to Oxford street in the days when Oxford Street had decent shops and anyway was and as far as I know still is in close proximity to decent shops.

Maybe we were slightly afraid Maybe might not bring what we needed or wanted Maybe isn’t always good. Maybe it would be a failed exam or a failed interview. I remember once throwing a pen across the desk at an interviewer, the pen had bled all over the form I had to fill in and so convinced was I that I hadn’t passed whatever test it was I didn’t care that my anger and frustration were visible. I passed the test and got the job Maybe it was the right time for me at that time.

I wasn’t going to bother with this frivolous little delicacy and then I thought I remember when every day was Maybe something wonderful I loved that I still do but I think the possibilities of Maybe have narrowed considerably.

But, there is still and for as long as we live there will always be Maybe

On the Surface

How beautiful, how serene and how very misleading for beneath the surface the webbed feet of both swans must be continually moving just to hold the contact the beautiful pose.

Are people like swans still and calm on the surface even as our hearts beat a tattoo and our emotions spiral out of control? I think to some degree we are expected to be just like the swan. We are expected to leave all our domestic problems at home to concentrate totally on work. At home we are expected to concentrate on family and domesticity. If we go out with friends we are expected to cast off all our problems and to help create, maintain and join in the revelry.

Oh, I think we are very much like swans almost all the action is beneath the surface, all our happiness, despair, anxiety, desperation, joy, relief and our passion are held tight within us, concealed not just from prying eyes but from everyone including ourselves lest we forget ourselves and reveal too much.

Do we tell our partners of our dreadful day, do we mention our fears? Maybe sometimes we do talk about somethings but more likely we don’t. We keep ourselves inside hidden from everyone lest everyone see how weak and needy we sometimes feel and how much less we secretly believe we are and can’t begin to explain.

Swans glide on the surface but, oh they can be bad tempered, aggressive birds, protective of their family, their home and their image – just like us

Reach

In this picture its easy to see why I hate boxing. It should be banned but that’s not my reason for using the picture today.

Today is about reach and of course all boxers need to reach, in addition boxers need to be able to reach their target at full speed and strength. No good reaching the opposing head if all you’ve got is the brute force of a butterfly and if anyone thinks punches to the head don’t cause brain damage look at the guy in reds face.

But that’s not what drew my attention to the Daily Post today. Oh no. Today is about education, mine specifically but extending to any clever clogs who think they know about reach. Reach is what we all do almost unthinkingly, we take a pot from a high shelf and automatically we’re on tip toe to reach. We don’t think about or even notice but we all do it and it never fails. Until now.

If most people think arthritic hips are all about walking or running think again. Hips are about kneeling, bending and reaching. I now have almost reached the stage of having to do the splits just to pick up the dogs dish, and it hurts.

It hurts in several ways sheer pain is the obvious one but I’m not sure its the most important I’ve a feeling that in my own case and I’m sure I’m not unusual its a sense of shame and disbelief. Of course I can reach the bloody dogs dish I’ve been doing it since I could walk! But the day is coming when I will have to lean on something sturdy in order to bend down far enough to reach the dogs dish, and if anyone thinks the walls of this house are sturdy enough to lean on…

Reach for the stars why don’t you. I’ll catch up with you when I’ve reached the dogs dish…

Blogging and Bloggers

http://www.inc.com/magazine/201602/kris-frieswick/how-gawkers-nick-denton-is-stepping-into-the-ring-against-hulk-hogan.html

Or since the link to Inc.5000 seems to be broken try this one

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/technology/2016/08/02/gawker-founder-nick-denton-files-for-bankruptcy-after-hulk-hogan/

Gawker Media recently lost an important court case, important to them because they lost and it bankrupted them. Important to blogging because blogging is where Mr Denton began what became Gawker.

Show business celebrity Hulk Hogan sued Gawker when they published a film of him that had been taken illegally.

You would think even the average half wit would know better than to be in any way involved with such criminally invasive behaviour. You would be wrong.

I happen to know some bloggers, note how blogger is becoming a dirty word, who have been involved with at least one other case of illegal filming, sharing the film with at a minimum an initial audience of their own ‘community’ and from there? Who knows. One problem is if they did such a terrible thing once the odds are they've done it several times.

Bloggers do love their ‘community’ to such an extent they seem to believe anyone should be honoured to join them and that joining them cancels out any teensy little criminal activity like hacking and illegal filming they may have been involved in.

It doesn’t. If you think about it the very idea is extraordinary: there are apparently some people who believe they can invade a persons privacy, make a film illegally, share it with what in reality are their accomplices and then by offering an invitation extended grudgingly, and of course to avoid incriminating themselves further anonymously, cancel out any and all crimes they may have committed against their victim, and from there its easy to see where Mr Denton’s ideas may have originated. How unfortunate for Mr Denton that as a result of such extraordinary arrogance both he and Gawker have had to file for bankruptcy.

A moments rational thought would tell anyone that the victim/s of such depravity would be very unlikely to want to join in, they might be the kind of rational, sensitive person who would reject the very idea of illegally filming anyone.

I’m not happy that Mr Denton is bankrupt I’d prefer it if he was sent to prison. He has an English accent but his business, if it can be called that, appears to have filed for bankruptcy in America which is where he gets lucky because the UK is quite strict about bankruptcy and Ireland which for example is where I’m based is even worse. In America Mr Denton will probably be able to start a new business or career quite easily and quickly, there’s probably loads of vacancies for washing up, road sweeping, grave digging, the list is endless and criminal bloggers can apply for all of them.

I don’t know about Hulk Hogan one hundred million dollars compensation may make him feel quite forgiving. I do know that in my own case money has little to do with it. Safety, security, equality and acknowledgement of wrong doing are what matters.

It maybe many bloggers are essentially lonely people, they maybe isolated from the mixture of company that most of us are surrounded by from starting school through to the end of our working years.  It maybe they compensate for their isolation by forming some sort of lop sided friendships with people they hardly if ever meet, have conversations that will hardly if ever touch on real lives. Whatever the reason some seem to develop another reality, or could it be they lose all contact with reality? I don't know and it makes no difference.

To be clear no one involved in the filming or viewing of any illegally obtained film of me is or will ever be a friend of mine. I’m easy going and very forgiving as I have previously shown but illegal filming is a premeditated criminal act and so is sharing the film.  No friend of mine would do that.

Mr and Mrs Khan

Spoke at the recent Democratic National Convention they told us of their son who was a Captain in the American Army and who died in Iraq. No doubt at all that young Mr Khan he was twenty seven was a brave soldier working and prepared to die for his country.

Does that mean his parents are? Like all bereaved parents Mr and Mrs Khan grieve for their son and like the vast majority of us they search for someone to blame. Mrs and Mrs Khan appear to have selected Donald Trump to take the brunt of their anger, but why is that? Donald Trump didn't cause the Iraq war he didn't even agree with it. If Donald Trump had his way it would never have happened. So why him?

The reason appears to be that Mr Trump would stop the open borders policy which with its inevitable consequence of unlimited access to every thug and murderer who goes to the American border has caused serious injury and death to many Americans, who Mr and Mrs Khan should note have  families who also grieve for the loss of children, parents and siblings.

Mr and Mrs Khan's greatest anger is not reserved for the killers of their son or the people who caused and maintained the war in Iraq instead and most peculiarly its centred on the man who would close all dangerous borders and make sure all visitors and immigrants to America would have legal passports, no criminal record and no connection to terrorist organisations. How can that be wrong and how can Mr and Mrs Khan object?

The reason is Mr and Mrs Khan object to Muslims being denied entrance to America while a new system of identity checks is introduced. Mr and Mrs Khan think its racist to prevent Muslims entering America even though Muslims are every nationality and almost every terrorist attack is carried out by Muslims and even though there have been terrorist attacks carried out by Muslims in America and even though the families of their victims grieve every bit as much as Mr and Mrs Khan.

I feel for Mr and Mrs Khan just as much as I feel for every victim of terrorist attacks. I am sure Mr and Mrs Khan's son was an American patriot but does that mean I think his parents are? Because I don't I think in spite of Mr Khan's declaration Mr and Mrs Khan are Muslim first because if they were American first they would recognise the need for border controls that work.

And that's all Donald Trump wants: real border controls that actually control who enters America. Mr and Mrs Khan need to think about that.

I didn't mention the Muslim Brotherhood which in my opinion is a terrorist organisation.

https://youtu.be/GGVq4s7DrJk

Friday go to Town Day

I had to go I didn't want to but it was a hospital appointment and so no choice. First I was going to walk into town, then I was going to get a cab. I didn't want to get a cab I knew if I did I would rat, take the cab all the way to the hospital and probably ask the driver to take me home too.

I didn't want to do that because I had a brand new, squeaky clean bus pass and like a kid with a red rover ticket I wanted to try it out so after all my dithering, it helped that the taxi number was busy, I decided to walk into town and get the bus. I got about two thirds of the way and my hips began to play up, then my right knee went and I almost hit the ground but I was strong and continued to town. The taxi number was busy...

The bus was late there I was out of breath from trying to turn a hobble into a run, naturally I was chain smoking, and the bus was late. I thought the hospital might be annoyed with me, I thought the damn bus chose the wrong day to be late and I thought my hips might not unbend enough to let me climb onto the bus, that's the strange thing about hips when they're rusting you can stroll along almost straight but the moment you try to lift your leg into an unfamiliar step they seize up altogether and you are embarrassed.

Did you know the step onto the bus is relatively high? I bet you didn't I can't say I'd noticed it much if at all before, anyway the bus driver was very nice waved my nice bus card away,  I competed the climb and hobbled to a seat.

I have to say I did enjoy the journey, the passenger across the aisle was very nice we would have had a chat but the passenger behind me, he with an English accent, kept interrupting, not at all in an unfriendly way but in a way that left no room for conversation. The passenger opposite and I shared a glance and the woman in front of him told me not to worry she was getting off the same stop as me and would let me know when we got there. I hadn't been concerned about finding the right stop only about how late I would be for my appointment but it was very kind of her to volunteer and I was grateful because it meant however slow I was getting out of the seat and down the aisle the bus would not take off with me still on it, such are the concerns of people with hips and knees.

The ultrasound waiting room was full and we were all agreed the drink they give you for something or other is absolutely foul and we grimaced and groaned our way through the obligatory four glasses or approximately one pint of the stuff. It all went very well I didn't get told off for being late, the nurse found a vein without too much trouble and I breathed in and out as directed. Time to go shopping.

My feet were killing me, I don't know why maybe the heat in the hospital made my feet swell but the last thing I wanted to do was shop, what I really wanted to do was have a nice cup of tea and spend the afternoon in close contact with my bathroom.

It just so happens there is a taxi rank outside Dunnes so when I had hobbled to the shops that's what I did. I decided my nice bus pass could wait for another return journey, got a cab and came home.

I was feeling quite pleased with myself. I had been there and done it and I was home with my feet up, which is when I remembered the bank and the shopping. I don't feel too bad about it after all I never go to town and remember everything, and my hips hurt, my knee gave way and by lunchtime my feet were giving me hell. It was almost nice to be home.

I do like Castlebar 

Just Saying

I love that phrase. Just saying, common as muck and obviously grabbed by some professional troll A) because it works and B) because it makes your professional troll feel superior to other genuine commenters.

I don't trust, that's it. I don't trust any of the people I've met online and some of the people I've met here in Ireland.

I don't believe the 'hand of friendship' routine. It doesn't work from those who helped to make me ill, are the reason I rarely go to town and who when I was ill did nothing more caring than breath a sigh of relief and hope they were off the hook for good.

There is no 'hook' anytime they want to tell the truth I'm right here to listen and anytime they lie I'm right here to tell the truth.

Some hide behind the excuse they don't know the others involved that is a lie and I've got five pictures, admittedly one of a couple in a car, proving the connection. True its only five pictures but they are pictures of people who came to my door, or more accurately to my garden gate, and they are as valid today as they were the day they were taken.

Of course there is more the never ending goading, threats and even at times enticing comments. All have ulterior motives one of which is to make me look like some sort of deranged fan that's probably what at least one of them told his wife.

At my age!? Be serious! I'm not a fan of anyone and the days when I felt sorry for those I thought must be sick are gone.

I do still prefer this blog I don't use it as much as of yore only because I might want to return here one day soon perhaps when I start my channel. I really aught to show the pictures

Someone stole a horse shoe from my garden and that was no more than a month or so ago. So no its not and nor can they let it be over they have too much to lose

I almost forgot! I do have some recorded telephone conversations, I record all telephone calls from suspicious sources. The last one was from Pat he wasn't connected until his mate Bernie told him his version pity he didn't tell Pat the truth, but its not the first time he's embroiled others and cost them quite a lot of money.

Outdoor Girl

She sits right on the edge of the path and watches her domain with possessive eyes. Eh, she loves it, she would prefer the front door be left open all day but since that's out of the question little girl sits just so on the edge of the path between front and back of the house and watches, ready to rush to the gate and bark at the merest hint of movement.

Of the five of us Maggie is the only one who really seems to love the garden. I don't I stopped caring five or more years ago, both cats go out and lol about a bit but they give the distinct impression they prefer to be in the warm and of course Jezzie is an indoor girl at heart. She does so hate the rain and cold. All four girls are home bodies except for Maggie who loves her home but rain or shine she loves her garden more.

Bless her she is still far too nervy, literally terrified of taking something from your hand, even to eat from her own bowl she has to be picked up, stroked and put in front of it, presumably to let her know she's allowed. I don't know what her life was like before she arrived here but fear must have been a big part of it, which is not to say she is not a brave girl! She is a determined, pushy little girl but something must have scared her badly and it saddens me to think she suffered.

Dallas

First and most important Respect to Dallas Police Five of them are dead and Seven are wounded and why? Because policemen both black and white didn’t run away when snipers started firing they ran into danger toward the gunfire. Politicians and scum like George Soros have been pounding the racist drum for years and last evening in Dallas their unrelenting efforts finally paid real dividends.

If Black Lives Matter want to make themselves useful they can demand action for unemployed and unskilled young black men, they can demand a system that makes it financially preferable for a young black couple to raise their children together in areas where its safe NOT to be a member of a gang, they can demand good teachers in their schools not the useless leftie preachers they get stuck with every time. Good teachers are not your friend they don’t care if your parents are separated, they care about children and making sure the children in their care respect them, their school, their own parents and their education. Start there Black Lives Matter and you will be starting to help black people.

I hear Google has chosen today of all days to announce its supporting Black Lives Matter aint that nice? So how are they going to do this is Google with its billions going to start making cars in Detroit are they going to create skilled jobs in Chicago? Are they going to set up offices in every run down high unemployment black area? How many black people do Google employ? How many black people does billionaire George Soros employ? And not just to wait tables, make the coffee and sweep the floor. How many skilled jobs do Google, George Soros or the entire Democrat party create for black people?

How many decent houses have they built or even renovated because there are a lot of boarded up empty houses in majority black areas. At best the Democrat party will offer some black people the opportunity to go to college and get the kind of degree that leaves them thousands of dollars in debt and unemployed. Black people need full apprenticeships and real college degrees not Micky Mouse political fiction courses that will leave them worse off than before they started the course.

I’ve been called racist because I believe the people in a country  regardless of colour are more important than the people in other countries. I believe the Muslim religion is dangerous and if its not taught properly in schools so that for example black people grow up knowing Islam is NOT their friend there will be real danger of a kind so far unseen in western countries.

Its not the fault of any black person except Barack Obama who mentions racism in every speech he makes but who has not created one worthwhile job for black people, and it is most emphatically the fault of every white person who stands well and far away from black people giving nothing positive but instead urging them on to ever greater anger and resentment.

Don’t ask Hillary Clinton what she will do for black people she’s not about to  change the habit of a lifetime and start helping black people now. She will use Dallas as a whip to beat black people into further rage and violence. She will shed her crocodile tears but she won’t create one decent job, not one decent school and not one decent housing area. None of them will.

I don’t know which politician is better but I do know more of the same will make lives worse

Dear Kev...

It was as you can doubtless imagine such an unexpected joy to hear from you today. I’m guessing you’ve already changed your email address to something less revealing. Be fair dear, you have to have it to bare it and that as I’m sure you know applies to everything however big, small or in some cases minuscule it may be.

I want you to know I was touched by your predicament it must be most unusual for someone like you to discover you are minus a ready if not entirely willing sponge. I do sympathise having grown to know you over the last several years I feel sure it was a most upsetting and very rare situation to find yourself inescapably immured…

Which reminds me from the moment I suggested it I thought I was being incredibly generous, too generous because if one is going to put the boot in its advisable to wear Doc Martins or at least something with steel toe caps and not for example ballerina slippers which give entirely the wrong impression, although I have to say and as you are in the process of learning its a mistake to think ballerina slippers are soft they too can be very firm.

I hope you are well, well enough to seek gainful employment because I’m sure you understand people have this nasty habit of insisting debts are paid.

I don’t want to leave you on a pessimistic note, not a bit! I want to leave you with an optimistic and very real prospect.

Gawker went bankrupt you know, I did read, although I can’t be certain it was in a blog after all, that the owner of Gawker has said he’s thinking of going back to blogging which is apparently where he started. Imagine my surprise.

Do be well and if you are forced to sleep on a handy beach it shouldn’t be too much of a hardship I understand its very warm where you are or at any rate where you’re going.

Take care and do feel free to email again it costs nothing and I’m always polite, understanding and don’t I just ooze empathy…

Oh, and Pippakin…says meiow

PS!

You were hacked! Oh, how dreadful. I know hackers are notorious for begging and of course your email must be so well known, sure it all makes sense. Coincidence though the amount they asked for being the same as the amount you owe but then you’re not the only one in debt are you.

I daresay your twitter account is also hacked quite often. Hmm

By the by, I sent WordPress a tweet asking for some information its not urgent in fact I’m sure its publicly available if they don’t reply I’ll just have to force myself to look it up and who knows what else I’ll find then.

I Must Confess

There is a part of me, quite a large part of me, that loves it when the, ahem, lawn is covered in wild flowers, tiny daisies and buttercups, forget me nots and others I have no names for. I do love the garden when it looks so colourful and free.

I don't spend as much time out there as once I did. I'm nervous of passers by, but I love the look of it and I love to walk to Ollie and Herself and have a chat, usually I'm joined by Pippa I'm sure she knows Ollie is there. I fill the water bowl and throw the leftovers for the birds.

I should have loved this last week when did Ireland last have such glorious and sustained good weather not in the last seven years that much I know, but I don't love it I hate it. Stress never goes away its a knot hindering my breathing and making relaxation impossible. I used to love sitting in the garden with a glass of wine. Forget that now its out of the question.

I don't want to hear the usual platitudes from the usual suspects this is what they did