Herself

I heard rather than saw her make a dash to me. I looked and there she was was lying half under my chair. She had the strength to run to me but not the strength to move as I picked her up.

She lay in my arms looking at me her eyes half closed and she smiled, anyone who knows cats know they smile. She smiled as I held her, told her it would be alright, that we were and would always be together.

I told her not to worry I would do that for both of us and I cuddled my beautiful Tax and cried and sobbed for us both and she lay smiling in my arms. She died with that unmistakable smile for me, for us and I sobbed as my heart broke in so many pieces.

There's so much chicken! I've been giving the cooked chicken to the terrible five I know they will eat it, we got to the stage that they wouldn't eat whatever Tax wasn't eating and fresh is better than tinned or dried every cat and dog knows that. 

I really don't want to cook chicken, well not for a very long time. I roasted it, curried it, stewed it, grilled it, braised it and boiled it and I never once ate it. It was hers I got the soup.....And the laughter of the shopkeeper when they asked did I really buy the chicken for my cat.....

I don't care I want to move I want to start thinking about that again. 

Strange from Trixie she went straight into the bathroom and used the litter tray, then so long at the foot of the couch moved to the top and lay there. It had belonged to Tax and now it belongs to Trixie that is very clear. Pippa is indifferent the only one she really likes is Ollie the going of Tax hardly seems to have registered. I can't say the dogs have noticed either but nor have they gone anywhere near her grave.

Its the law of the jungle we live, we die. I don't cry now. I turned her radiator off. She has gone and I will miss her forever.